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Checked the mail today...got a letter from unemployment saying Jay was denied. His fucking company stood in the way - even though they said they wouldnapos;t.
I donapos;t know how weapos;re going to live.
I donapos;t make enough to pay our bills...I donapos;t get enough in my next paycheck to may our rent. I only took this fucking job to SUPPLEMENT our income. Not to mention that I hate it.

I wish I could turn the clock back 4 months and start over. I wouldnapos;t have closed the studio, I wouldnapos;t have left the shithole of Worcester...even though I hated living there. I wouldnapos;t have taken this job and caused Jay to get fired. And at least weapos;d be paying for our basic necessities.

This is completely my fault. I fucked up and now my entire family is paying for it. I have a feeling they wouldapos;ve been a whole lot better off without me.

I really donapos;t feel like dancing today.

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